"All of my life, where have you been? I wonder if I'll ever see you again." - Lenny Kravitz, Again

I've followed her around for a week now. I know every pattern, every routine she has. Every morning at 6 am, she goes for an hour run. She leaves for work at 7:30 and returns at 4. I watch her at 4:30 everyday as she walks down to the mailbox and gets the mail. And I watch as every evening she sits on the couch and watches TV before climbing the stairs to that big lonely bed.

I sink a little lower in my car as the door to her house opens and she steps outside. God, she's amazing. Her face is tipped upward, a small smile on her face as she enjoys the last of warm sunshine and light fall breeze that ruffled a blue bandana covering that red wildness of her hair. Maddie can make the most common clothes look like high fashion. Like today, she's wearing a baggy white man's shirt over worn jeans. I can't help but wonder if the shirt belongs to Fawkes. She's one of those women that steal clothes from the men they know. I'm pretty sure she got one of my t-shirts when she escaped. Her feet were bare and I watched her carefully pad down the slate walkway to the mailbox. Pulling it open, she peers inside before retrieving the letters. Flipping through the mail, she stands at the end of the driveway, unaware of how close I am.

She walks back up to the porch and sits down to open the mail. Everyday I watch her do this and now I can tell what each letter is just by her face. First she opens a bill, her nose wrinkled in distaste as she quickly set it aside. The next was junk mail, also set aside with indifference. She put a magazine in another pile and then opened the last envelope. This one was personal letter. Those beautiful green eyes light up as she reads it, laughing at something amusing. When she was done, she scooped up the mail and opened the door. She paused there though and turned back, scanning the street. I slouched down into the seat waiting for her to go back inside.

I let out a breath I hadn't realized I'd been holding when she went inside. Oh man, I thought she saw me but she hadn't indicated she had. I started the car and gave the house one final look before pulling away. Time to get dinner before I come back for the evening.

When I return she's not home. Good, it's easier to break in when you don't have to worry about anyone hearing you. Getting out of my car, I strolled up the driveway and around the side of the garage to the door. Standing a little back from the door, I looked closely at each pane of glass, looking for the loose one. I'd seen Maddie get inside this way when she locked herself out one day.

Jiggling each panel, I found the loose one and slid it out of the way so I could unlock the door. Once inside I made sure the glass was back in its place before finding the fuse box and turning off the power to the house.

I've studied her file and I know the house had belonged to her Keeper, a man she considered her brother. She's lived with him since she was five, most of that time in this house. So I can understand the emotional connection. But still, it's a damn big house for someone like her. She doesn't even have a pet.

I smile at that thought. Maddie needs a pet. A dog? Something small and furry. Hamster? Nah. I shook my head. A cat. Maddie is a cat person. A kitten, black. Yeah, definitely a cat.

Much too big for her. She needs to share it with someone. I briefly indulge a fantasy of small children with red hair and dark green eyes, of Maddie waiting for me to come home from work.

Shaking my head at that thought, I make my way upstairs. Not me, she needs someone stable in her life. Maybe Fawkes. I laugh knowing just how stable Fawkes really was. I've seen his file too. I know about the quicksilver madness. Her bedroom is to the right of the top of the stairs, at the front of the house and I begin a quiet search of the room. Her gun is hidden in a holster on the back of her nightstand. Neat trick that. I was betting she could draw it without making much movement. Turning it over in my hand, I examined it. A .9mm Glock. Personally, I thought it was the wrong gun for her. But then I wasn't sure which kind was the right one. Everything else in here screams of Maddie. The quilt and sheets on the bed is some dark color. The dresser and bed are a dark wood, the bed a sleigh style. The walls are a pale color, blue I think. Search done, gun tucked in the back of the waistband of my jeans, I sit in a chair next to the closet. Before I know it, I'm back on my feet pacing the room. I can't sit still. I feel like some teenager waiting for his girlfriend on prom night. So I explore.

There's something wonderfully taboo about looking at a woman's things when she's not there. I did this when I broke into Scully's place too. I'm sure a psychiatrist would have a field day with that. Like I'd ever let a fucking shrink anywhere near my head. I touch her perfume bottles, poke through her jewelry box before moving into the bathroom. The typical collection of bottles lines a shelf along the tub. I sniff at each one trying to pin down the one Maddie used on a regular basis. Smiling, I gazed at the huge bathtub, picturing Maddie in it, bubbles piled high around her. The mental picture gave me hard on. Hell, who was I kidding? Just thinking about her gives me a hard on.

The sound of the door opening and locks being thrown brought me out of my daydream and I quickly adjusted myself before finding my hiding spot by the door. She was humming softly as she climbed the stairs and I debated whether she would see me when she stepped inside. I didn't know if she had another gun on her. I didn't think she did, but you can never be too careful. Then God smiled on me. A cloud drifted over the moon and shrouded the room in darkness.

My eyes adjusted quickly and I flattened myself against the wall waiting for her. Still humming, she stepped inside and I grabbed her from behind, quickly feeling for weapons when she started screaming. Now, Maddie is a lot stronger than she looks but all her kicking and struggling were doing absolutely nothing to free her. And the screaming was starting to hurt my ears. So I covered her mouth with my hand and spoke against her ear. "No one's going to hear your screaming little girl but I'm going to ask you not to anyway. It hurts my ears."

I let her go just as the moon emerged and the room was light again. She spun around and froze. Her face had that look that deer get right before the semi flattens them. Shit. Maybe this was a bad idea. "Hi, Maddie."

"Alex?" Her voice was hesitant, disbelieving.

"Hi angelchra." She was moving backward out of my reach.

"I'm not your angel." Now she sounded angry. Damn, this really wasn't going the way I'd planned. She was still backing up, heading for the nightstand.

I reach behind me and pulled out the gun. "Are you looking for this?" I waved it at her before tossing it on the chair. "You should have known I would find it. I'm a professional."

She laughed harshly. "Yeah, I know. Did you come to take me back to your employers?"

Okay, maybe taunting her was not the best idea. "No." I stalked slowly around the side of the bed and stopped, leaning against the footboard, watching her.

I was making her nervous. She backed up, until her back hit the dresser. "Then why are you here?"

"I couldn't get you out of my head. Your eyes haunted me. I saw you everywhere." I kept watching her as she squirmed, obviously uncomfortable under my gaze.

"What do you want Alex?"

I moved then, quicker than a cat, putting my hands on either side of her on the dresser, unwilling to let her get away. "To apologize." I lowered my mouth to hers before she could say anything else.

My fingers tugged at the buttons of her shirt, mouth ravaging hers. She pushed me away, breathing hard.

"Darien-" She began but I cut her off, not wanting her to think about him just now. I needed her to understand why I was there, to understand me.

"Is not here. This is about you, me and what we started in DC." I lowered my mouth to hers, needing to taste her, feel her. I was dying of thirst and she was an oasis in the desert. Her little hands were pulling at my t-shirt and I released her so she could pull it over my head.

She pulled back from me, examining my scars and I let her, eyes closed just feeling her. Her fingers trace them causing shivers to run through me. I felt something cool and wet on my arm and I looked down. Maddie was tracing my newest scar with her tongue. The line was still pink. I'd needed stitches from the knife she lodged in my arm. I felt her mouth open and teeth scrape the scar. Hissing, I picked her up around the waist and set her on the dresser.

I looked her over, sitting on the dresser legs swinging with a pouty look on her face, her shirt hanging open, exposing her tanned stomach and emerald green bra. Wanton was the only word that described her. Then I noticed her hair was still covered. "What is this?" I pulled the bandana off, revealing her hair before burying my face in it. Her shampoo is light, smelling almost like peaches.

"It's a bandana. I was cleaning today." She explained, a little breathless.

"Your hair is just like you, little girl. Wild, untamed. I love it." I traced her ear with my tongue, nipping gently on her earlobe. "You shouldn't cover it." Her breathing quickened as I moved lower to the pulse in her throat.

"I won't." She promised. I felt her hands in my hair, pulling gently at first, then harder. I lifted my head, looking into her eyes. The green was darker, passion blazing in their depths. She leaned forward as if she was going to kiss me and bit down gently on my lower lip.

I growled, turning it into a kiss while I pulled her shirt down her arms, tossing it to the floor. My hands slid around her smooth skin to unhook her bra, sliding it down her arms and tossing it aside. I ran my hands over her breasts, cupping one of her breasts, thumb rubbing over the nipple. Her hands dug into my hair as I nuzzled the top of her breasts. I heard a soft cry and chuckled. She trembled and wrapped her legs around my waist, pulling me closer, sliding her hands down my chest to the top of my jeans.

"I want these off."

I laughed at her enthusiasm and pulled back from her. "As my lady commands." Gazing into her eyes, I slowly stripped out of my jeans. She sat watching me, chewing onto her lower lip, looking absolutely sexy as all hell. Shaking my head, I walked back to her. "What wicked thoughts are running through that pretty head of yours?"

She smiled. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

I laughed and lifted her off the dresser. She shrieked and beat her fists against my chest as I tossed her on the bed. I worked at her jeans, pulling them off and tossing them away.

The ugly bullet wound stood out on the white skin of her upper thigh. I shot her the night she escaped. She was losing control, almost killed me with a flying candlestick. Leaning down, I kissed the scar softly. "I'm sorry for this." The words came out so softly, I was afraid she didn't hear me.

"You were just doing your job, right?" Her response was harsh, angry.

I knew my face smoothed into the mask I work when I was working. I crawled up until we were eye to eye. "You're alive, aren't you?" My fingers traced the lines and curves, as if I could memorize her body by touch. She ran her tongue over my mouth and I pulled her to me, kissing her brutally hard, our tongues feeling and tasting each other. By the time I let go of her, we were breathing hard. Leaning my head against her chest, I trailed my hands down her stomach to her panties and laughed.

"What?"

I brushed the line of the emerald green panties before looking back up at her. They were the exact color of her eyes. "Your underwear matches your eyes."

"I like to look pretty." She said softly, a little jokingly.

I leaned over and kissed her forehead. "You do. But I think these need to go." Reaching down, I hooked my fingers under the band. She lifted her hip to help me as I pulled them down her legs. My hands played over her stomach and lower, between her legs, the touch causing her to moan. She raised her hips unconsciously and I touched her in slow circles as my mouth made it's way up her throat. I pressed a finger into her and she cried out.

"Alex."

I smiled as I drove her closer to the edge. I liked the sound of my name coming from her lips. "Say it again."

She looked up at me her eyes showing confusion. "What?" I lifted up, taking off my boxers.

"My name. Say it again." I pressed her into the bed as I rolled between her legs, entering her slowly. God, she was tight.

"Alex." My name came out as a sigh as I began to move, slowly. She moved with me, her hips gently meeting mine. "God, Alex."

I groaned when she said my name. I wanted her above me. I grabbed her hips and rolled us so she was on top. She whimpered softly as I slid into her further. Maddie moved above me, rocking, head back, eyes closed. I took her hand, intertwining our fingers, palms touching and she came, shuddering and tightening around me. I rolled us back over as she was still shuddering and quickened my pace. I thrust into her harder, smiling at the noises she was making.

Her eyes were squeezed tightly shut. "Open your eyes lyob' emay."

She did and I looked into her beautiful green eyes. Beautiful, glowing green eyes. What the fuck? I faltered and brought a hand up to touch her face.

"What?" She looked at me with those amazing eyes.

"Your eyes. They're glowing." Her eyes were hypnotic, scary and captivating at the same time.

Panting, she nodded. "When I use my powers, they glow. The greater the intensity, the. brighter. the. glow." She finished breathing out each word as I started to move again, faster this time. She cried out as I slammed into her over and over. I thrust once more into her as I came and collapsed on top of her breathing hard into her hair. After a moment, I pushed myself up onto my arms and looked down at her again. Those eyes were still watching me. She ran a hand over my shoulder and down my arm. I pulled the soft comforter up over us and dropped back down, my head resting in the crook of her neck.

I was lying on my stomach, Maddie on her back underneath me, my body half covering hers. I wrapped my arms around her, hugging her tightly. I was afraid she was going to leave, disappear right out of my arms. She made a squeak at the strength of the embrace and I looked up apologetically.

She smiled, caught in the middle by a yawn. "Are my eyes still glowing?"

My hand came up to touch the bone beneath her eye. "A little." I let my hand drop and let myself stare off into space.

I found myself wishing my life different. That she could be a real part of it. Yawning, I rolled her so her head was pillowed on my chest and she quickly drifted to sleep. I knew I would leave before she woke so I indulged in my domestic fantasies until I followed her into sleep.

It's still dark outside when I slip from her bed, her arms. As I dress, I watch her, memorizing every line and curve.

She's my krassivaya angelchra. My beautiful angel. Asleep, she looks so much younger than her twenty-five years. Her hair is messy, falling over her eyes and she makes a small noise, as she turns further into the pillow. What I would give to wake up to her everyday. To have her in my life.

I shake my head at those thoughts and slip on my well-worn leather jacket. I briefly think about leaving it for her but decide against it in case she didn't want to remember. Besides I love this fucking jacket. My life is no place for an angel. Too many people gunning for me and vice versa. But standing next her pillow, I let myself have one last dream.

God damn, that red hair is going to haunt me. I've got this thing for redheads you know.

Leaning down, I pull the quilt that has snuck down to the end of the bed up over her and kissed her forehead softly. "Bye Maddie." I whisper softly, knowing she doesn't hear me.

I walked silently through the kitchen and out the back door, on one last mission for my redheaded angel. In my week observing Maddie, I learned a few things. The most important of which, right now anyway, is that the woman who lives two doors down has an amazing flower garden in her front yard. And she never gets up before nine.

Out of guilt I slipped a fifty into the woman's mail slot before making my way back to Maddie's with my spoils. I found a glass vase in one of the upper cabinets and try to arrange the flowers nicely. It's not really my forte but I try. I set the vase on her dresser so she'll see it when she wakes up and quietly creep out the front door.

I love the suburbs. My rental car is still parked a few houses down from Maddie's. If this had been DC, I probably would have kissed my car good bye at about 3 am. Either towed by the cops or stolen. But not here, God fucking forbid Mr. Smith's Beemer gets towed, there'd be a new police chief the next day, I think as I climb into the drivers seat to wait.

Fawkes showed up around eight holding coffee and a bag, probably containing doughnuts or something. He knocked on the door and then fidgeted as he waited for an answer.

I can't decide if I like Fawkes or not. I checked him out, wanted to make sure Maddie wasn't getting herself in any trouble with him. So I know all about him. But I also know the Agency. Everyone who works there has an agenda of some kind. But I can't figure out his. He seems to be good for Maddie. Maybe I'll pay him a little call. Just to make sure he understands my view on this situation.

Maddie finally answered the door. She's wearing a royal blue robe, holding the top tightly closed. Fawkes said something to her and she threw herself into his arms. After a minute, she pulled him inside and shut the door.

I debated calling. What if she answers? Would she talk to me, let me talk to him? She looked upset when she hugged him. Maybe she regrets last night ever happened.

Oh fuck it. I dial the number from memory and waited. God smiled on me once again, a male voice answered.

"Hello?"

"Agent Fawkes." My voice was hard. My working voice.

"Krycek." There was a pause and I could almost hear what he was thinking. "You were here. The flowers were from you."

A good sign, she wasn't pissed enough at me to throw them out. "Don't be too angry at her. This was something I, we had to do." I knew he would attack me for leaving Maddie.

"She's hurt. You left." His voice matched my own. I closed my eyes, pressing on the bridge of my nose with my free hand. "It's better this way. I don't want her to have anything to do with my life. She's got you."

He didn't say anything and we sat in silence, only a faint buzzing coming over the line.

"Did she like them?" I finally ask.

He knew what I meant. "They're still here so I'd say so."

"Good." I took a deep breath and continued. "Take care of her Agent Fawkes. If I find out she got hurt by you or the Agency, I'll hunt you down."

His answer surprised me. Maybe he understands. "I will man. Just answer a question for me."

"Sure." How bad could one question be?

"Was this another part of the game? Just another job to you?" Darien's voice was hard, angry.

I closed my eyes and leaned back against the car seat. "Not anymore, Fawkes. Not anymore." I pressed the end button and tossed the cell phone on the seat next to me. Taking one last look at the house, I started the car and headed down the street.

I might never see Maddie again. But at least I know she's in good hands.